In a shocking turn of events that has the city’s socialites clutching their pearls (and their stomachs), the luxurious ITC Colombo hotel is at the center of a massive food poisoning scandal. What was meant to be an elegant afternoon of high tea, dubbed the “Ladies’ Gossip Gala,” turned into a scene straight out of a disaster movie, with over 50 attendees reportedly falling ill from contaminated delicacies.
Eyewitnesses described the horror unfolding at the hotel’s opulent Grand Ballroom, where Colombo’s elite gathered for what promised to be an afternoon of refined chatter, cucumber sandwiches, and endless cups of Darjeeling. Instead, guests were hit with waves of nausea, vomiting, and dizziness shortly after indulging in the spread.
“It started with a few whispers about the scones tasting off,” said one anonymous socialite, who we’ll call Mrs. Posh for her protection. “Next thing you know, half the room is rushing to the restrooms like it’s Black Friday at a designer sale. I swear, that clotted cream had a vendetta!”
Health officials from the Sri Lankan Ministry of Health rushed to the scene after multiple emergency calls flooded in around 4 PM. Preliminary reports suggest the culprit could be a batch of undercooked prawns in the seafood canapés or perhaps a rogue strain of bacteria in the finger sandwiches. “We’re investigating all angles,” stated Dr. Ravi Perera, lead epidemiologist on the case. “But let’s just say, this high tea went from ‘high society’ to ‘high alert’ in record time.”
ITC Colombo, known for its five-star elegance and celebrity sightings, issued a statement expressing “deep regret” over the incident. “The health and safety of our guests is our top priority,” read the hotel’s press release. “We are cooperating fully with authorities and offering complimentary antacids to all affected parties.” Sources close to the management whisper that the event’s organizer, a notorious ladies’ gossip club called “The Whispering Willows,” may have cut corners on catering to save on costs for extra champagne.
Victims, including prominent influencers and business tycoons’ wives, have taken to social media to vent their fury – and their lunches. Hashtags like #ITCPoisonTea and #GossipGag are trending, with memes showing teacups morphing into biohazard symbols. One viral post from influencer @ColomboChic reads: “Thought I was spilling tea, but ended up spilling my guts! Never again, ITC!”
As the investigation continues, the city is abuzz with speculation. Was it sabotage from a rival hotel? A disgruntled chef settling a score? Or just bad luck at the buffet? One thing’s for sure: this “Ladies’ Gossip Gala” will be remembered not for the juicy rumors, but for the juicy… well, you get the idea.
Stay tuned for updates. In the meantime, if you’re planning high tea, maybe stick to biscuits from a packet.
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